Happy 2nd Birthday my little buddy! I love you more than I could ever express. I'm sad to say Your birth quickly changed from one of the most happiest days to the darkest day of my life. I regret that I let Satan steel my joy that day with your diagnosis. I was afraid of the unknown. I was afraid of losing you. Little did I know that God choose me to be your momma because we are a perfect match. Because he knew I needed you. This past 2 years I've drawn close to God and played these words over and over from the song, Oceans by Hillsong. "Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders let me walk upon the waters wherever you would call me. Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander and my faith would be made stronger in the presence of my Savior." Connor you have pushed me to rely on Jesus more. To trust him. To know that He is going to give me more than I can handle so that I look to Him for my strength. I have a closer relationship to Him because of you. Thank you. Connor you have an amazing ability to light up the room. To put a smile on someone's face. You are a blast to be with! You give the best snuggles and your open mouth kisses, oh my! You are already a teacher of life. I'm patient, yet anxious to see, how God continues to use you to teach life lessons. You make others comfortable with differences. In the wise words of Emilia Armendariz, "He's the best baby ever. I wish he could be my baby when I'm a mommy." Connor, you melt hearts.
I love how you adore your brother. I can't wait for the day when Hunter tells me that you are his best friend. I recall one day when Hunter had hurt himself and he was crying, all of a sudden you started crying too. Because you felt Hunters pain. It reminded me of how Jesus feels our hurts, pains and joy.
I thank God for protecting me from what I thought I wanted, but blessing me with what I didn't know I needed. Connor, I need you.
Love you always, Connor!
